Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Thankful



I am so thankful of my friend who took this great picture, she's awesome, isn't she??

I am thankful of my babies, I am thankful to have a wonderful husband, I am thankful we keep each other on our toes and we don't put up with one another nitty gritty stuff, we are honest and yes we laugh a lot and of course we do have arguments, sometimes they are silly, sometimes they are serious but I'm thankful for each one of this moments we have together!!

I am thankful to be a part of a group that is learning to grow together as we do bible study, to share, to laugh, to think, to recognize our faults, to want to do better as we go in this journey each week and actually every day.

There are so many things I'm thankful for, it's hard to even begin to put them on a list. All I know is that I love Thanksgiving time, it makes me exercise in my mind all the things I so greatfully appreciate in my life!!

This year we are having lunch at our house, normally I do Christmas Eve but since I'll be bigger than the biggest Santa you ever saw I felt it would be better if I did my duty for this celebration and pass the torch to someone else for the next one. :)

I like cooking but I'm not confident enough to bake a turkey, so I told my mother-in-law if she would do the turkey I'd do everything else and put the house, she accepted my deal and everything is ready for our lunch tomorrow. I am excited, I like to have this get together because my goal is to make it as simple as possible so we can actually enjoy ourselves instead of just being stress out over the cooking, the decorating, the cleaning and all that. I know this time a year people pull their most fine china out of the cabinet and make everything look perfect, call me a redneck but I don't have china (I totally don't see the point to have it, may be when I'm older I'll change my mind), I buy pretty paper plates, who wants to do dishes on Thanksgiving, I just want to sit down and enjoy the time together, isn't that what all this is about??? May be is because my Mom - because of her job - had to work harder on every holiday, which put a chip in my brain to chose not to stress over the holidays, not to over work myself unless absolutely necessary (that day hasn't come yet) but to enjoy it. I want Nicolas and Emilia to grow up and have good memories of this times, I know so many people who don't even decorate their house because they have such a bad memories of the holidays, the stress and the work can make moms mean, it wasn't my case, my mom was always sweet although she worked herself way too much.

Can't wait to put up our Christmas Tree and the few little things that I put up this time of year. Believe it or not I kept my Nativity scene up all year, I strongly felt the need to do it as a reminder of how important that day is for us. Not sure any of my family members noticed but I did :) Well may be Nicolas enjoyed playing with the cow from the nativity and occasionally he got Mary out of her place to show me baby Jesus.

This is one of my favorite times of the year, it's been since I was a little girl. Growing up in South America, December marked the end of a school year, my birthday, my mom's birthday, Christmas and the beginning of summer, what else could a little girl like me wanted. All the things that were huge in life started in the same month. I guess in my subconscious mind I still have that joy and excitement.

During these celebrations I always think of those who have lost a family member (I know plenty of families who will be hurting because it will be their first Thanksgiving and Christmas without their dad, without their child, etc) how hard and painful is that, can you even begin to imagine ... I truly can't. I just know the only thing that can get them through is the love of our Father and the support of their loving ones here on earth. I think of my mom, who's only child decided to move to the other side of the world but I am happy to know we have tons of family who are making sure she's happy, filled with love and excited to spend another end of the year with them.

What do you think about during this time of year? Does it make you happy? Does it make you sad? Do you ever think about it?

Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving to all!!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

How things change from one pregnancy to the next

It's been so long since I've posted anything, I do have the perfect excuse though ... I'm pregnant, remember? :0) Seriously, being pregnant this second time has been so different, more exhausting, more challenging than the first time (this is when I think of families like my aunt's, who birth 5 kids!! Holy Cow!). On the other hand it has gone by so quickly, Matt and I have talked about this so many times, with Nicolas it felt like forever, like he was just not going to get here anytime soon, we dream about him constantly, who is he going to look like? how is his voice going to sound? what's smell would he have the first time we hold him? how warm would he be? and every single question that had ever existed, we thought, we dream. I did everything babycenter.com told me to do, well not everything but you know a lot more than what I've done this time around. I think at this point of my pregnancy Nicolas had heard Baby Mozart in my belly so many times I had lost count, ask me how many times has Emilia heard it? ... ONCE! Yes, just once, it was a Sunday afternoon a few weeks ago (may be longer than a few, who knows) and I was relaxed reading a book of my favorite Chilean writer and it hit me, I had never allowed her to listen to classical music so I went and got the CD player (Yes I do have an iPod but I haven't downloaded music for it in a while and it certainly has no baby music in it, that's mommy's toy.) Anyway, all this to say wow how things change from one child to the next, and she is not even born yet.

Please don't misunderstand me, I will love my baby girl as much as I love my baby boy (yeah yeah he's not a baby, I know but in my heart he will always be) but you know, you find yourself with 3 years of experience on being a mother and those things that where oh so important, are not so that important anymore. You know the little things that you used to loose sleep over just doesn't matter anymore and I love that freedom. I love the fact that even though I know each child is different and unique we know what we are getting ready to face, there is not a fear of the unknown, at least not for this first few months, I even know the day she will be born because it's going to be a schedule C-section. I love it!! I'm not one who enjoys "to-do lists", I feel trapped by them, I say this to let you know I am not a planner, I don't like when you have to make your yearly appointments for the Doctor a year in advanced and that sort of thing, but I do enjoy the fact that I know for sure what day she will be born (Unless God has other plans for us of course, He always has the last word).

A lot of people has asked me what does Nicolas say or if he's excited and I can honestly answer he is really excited, which tells me he has no clue how is life is getting ready to change ha ha ha. He kisses my belly (he has to pull my shirt up in order to do that, somehow the bare skin contact is a must have to love on his sister), he's been very excited about opening presents that some people has already given us (what a blessing!), his main concern is to make sure she is not going to sleep "on my bed mommy!", I've tried hard to explain to him that she will live with us forever (yeah right, only for 18 or 20 years ...), I have also told him that when she's born she will be tiny and not able to play with him, talk, eat regular food. We have three different books that explain the process that goes on when Mommy goes to the hospital and brings a baby home. We've looked at his baby pictures to show him he was tiny once, that he was in my belly too, that he did wear diapers and we had to feed him, that he had a first bath picture, etc. He has enjoyed seeing himself on the short videos we made of him when he was a baby. It's been a sweet process we've lived together.

The fact that this Christmas will be the last one he will have by himself with us it's a mixture of feelings to me, Matt keeps saying is not a bad thing and I know that too but being an only child myself ... I know how good it felt to be the only one! :0) My husband was the 3rd of three children so he knows what having sibling is like, thank goodness, because I have no clue! he he he. I'm glad at least one of us knows what we are doing here ... just kidding!

We are only 13 weeks away from her big arrival. Wow where has the time gone!